make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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