I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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