So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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