Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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