I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
