What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize