Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
