R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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