Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize