ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
