what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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