she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
