he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
