Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
How does one acquire holy water?
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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