its not stalking. its research.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
