he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
