Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
