Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
