i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
