That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Randomize
