Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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