i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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