Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
