My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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