I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
