I got chris browned last night
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
