Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
How drunk are you?
Completed.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
