Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize