You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Just high enough for therapy.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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