PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
