She said her name was "party"
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
