so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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