Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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