The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I use my feet as sexual weapons
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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