69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
