They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
