I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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