What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
