well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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