Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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