Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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