Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
