I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
