if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
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