i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
But break dance skills will only take you so far
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I have fence marks all over my body
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
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