At least make sure they are 18
Why
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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