I wannas sexs uuuuu
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
she looked like the before picture.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
