Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
The Olympian is in my bed
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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