Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
