I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
PANTIES FOUND
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