Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
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