Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
we have officially lost it.
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
